Thoughts and Firewhiskey
by PersonWhoWritesStuff
Summary: The night of Slughorn's party from Ron's POV, with an . . . alternate ending.


This is another random one shot idea i had...hope you enjoy!

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><p>She looked depressed. Really, really depressed. There was no possible way that it could've been Ron's doing, though. Why would she even care that much? Exactly. She wouldn't. So it wasn't his fault she wasn't eating. Just because he made fun of her in class . . . <em>She's <em>Hermione Granger_, she should be used to being made fun of by now._

Ron glanced at her. That was a terrible thing to think.

Not that he cared. She deserved it. She laughed at his mustache. It's not like she's trying to be the bigger person. Why should he?

"You could say sorry."

"What, and get attacked by another flock of canaries?"

"What did you have to imitate her for?"

She deserved it!

"She laughed at my mustache!"

"So did I, it was the stupidest . . ."

The rest of Harry's sentence got drowned out by the presence of his girlfriend. Being the dutiful boyfriend he was, he dropped whatever he was doing at the moment, just to pay her the kind of attention she insisted on having.

Ron tried to ignore his surroundings, which proved most difficult once _she_ joined the conversation. He was only able to pretend she wasn't there until he heard-

" . . . I'm meeting Cormac at eight and we're-"

Ron pulled away from Lavender. She must've assumed he was tired, or needed to take a breath, because she said nothing, and also looked keen on listening to what Hermione was saying.

"-we're going up to the party together."

_Cormac! ? Cormac McLaggen! ?_ Ron wanted, desperately, to demand.

Luckily Parvati saved him from making an arse out of himself.

"That's right," Hermione answered her, "The one who _almost_ became Gryffindor Keeper."

_Yes, but he _didn't_, though, because he's an idiot who couldn't make that last save, and I made all of them, because I'm better. _Ron thought proudly. He knew, though, that saying this out loud would probably only earn him questioning looks from Lavender, which would then lead him to having to explain to her why he was so determined to make it clear who the best Quidditch player was.

"Are you going out with him, then?" Parvati asked.

_Of course she's not! Hermione would never go out with someone like _Cormac McLaggen!

"Oh-yes-didn't you know?" Hermione answered. Then she giggled. She _giggled_! Hermione doesn't giggle . . .

"No!" Parvati said, "You like your Quidditch players, don't you? First Krum-"

_Don't remind me._

"-then McLaggen . . ."

"I like _really good_ Quidditch players."

Really good _Quidditch players? Krum, yeah . . . but McLaggen! ? He didn't even make the team! I did! You don't even care about Quidditch! At least you don't whenever I talk about it! So, what? Any other guy plays Quidditch, and you just fall right for him? Except for me, of course. Is that your one rule? You'll like any old Quidditch player, as long he's not a poor ginger?_

_That's why you like them, isn't it? Krum and McLaggen. Because they're rich? All you'd have to do is ask, and they'd each be willing to invest tons of galleons into spew . . ._

_Of course merely putting up with it wasn't enough for you. Well, I'm sorry that you just don't understand that the elves _like_ working without pay._

Hermione had eventually left, as he was thinking all of this. Lavender and Parvati started eagerly discussing Hermione's newfound interest in McLaggen, which seemed to be just as much of a shock to them, as it was to Ron.

Though he kept his expression blank, his insides were anything but.

_Are you happy? _A bitter voice in his head asked himself, _What were you thinking, anyway? Ditching her for Lavender? Were you really stupid enough to believe that she wouldn't get over you that easily? Like you said, she's _Hermione Granger. _Maybe she got made fun of all the time in her first year, but these days she could probably have any guy here. Why would she care about you? You can barely afford her a good Christmas present. You're lucky you found Lavender, who only wants to snog. That is, after all, all you have to offer, isn't it? Hermione would want someone with brains, someone she could talk to. You can barely finish one school assignment without her help. You're pathetic, Weasley._

Ron managed to shut this voice out of his head throughout the rest of dinner.

He didn't feel like snogging Lavender that night, so he told her he had a headache, and was just going to go to bed early. Though, he was really planning on spending the evening alone, wallowing in his own self-pity.

After he trudged up the stairs, he yanked open the door to find Seamus and Dean. Seamus was sitting on his bed, while Dean looked as if he was about to leave. They both stared when Ron barged in.

"Oi, what's the matter with you?" Seamus asked.

Ron ignored him and walked over to his dresser, and started violently looking for his pajamas.

Dean smirked, "Oh, I know what your problem is. Ginny told me Hermione's going to Slughorn's party with McLaggen."

Again, Ron ignored him.

"Oh, come on," Seamus said, also smirking, "You've got Lavender, mate. Hermione's bossy and annoying. I mean, she's got a nice body, but-"

At this he spun around, "What! ?"

"I'm just saying, she-"

"Don't!" Ron shook his head, "Do _not_ ever let me catch you _looking at Hermione's body_!"

Seamus shrugged, but had a knowing look on his face, "Why not? It's not like she's seeing anyone. Maybe I'm interested . . ."

Ron rolled his eyes and turned back to his clothes, "Yeah, like she'd go out with you when she could have Viktor Krum . . . even Cormac McLaggen is at least a year older than us . . ."

He said it so quietly that Seamus couldn't tell if he was actually talking to him, or just to himself. He gave Dean a look behind Ron's back. They both looked slightly uncomfortable.

Dean then said, "Er-this has been fun and all, but I have to go meet Gin-someone . . . bye." and left.

Seamus sighed, "Come on, Ron. I know what'll cheer you up." Then he got up, opened his dresser, and pulled out two bottles of firewhiskey, handing one to Ron.

Ron decided to go along with it, and take advantage of the fact that there was no one around to scold him for drinking.

Several drinks later, Seamus decided that Ron was drunk enough to finally admit what was bothering him.

"So, what has got you lookin' so depressed?" he asked, his words slurring, since he had just as many drinks.

"That's the thing," Ron said, his voice equally slurred, "I shouldn't be depressed, right? I have a girlfriend, who just wants to snog me all day. I shouldn't care if Hermione's off snogging McLaggen, right?"

"No, she can go sod off-wait!-do you fancy Hermione?"

Ron stared, with glazed over eyes, at nothing for a few seconds, "I . . . I don't know. She asked me out, you know. I was supposed to go to that party with her, not McLaggen . . ."

"Well why isn't she takin' you, then? Why is she going with that git?"

Ron looked angry for a minute, "You know, I don't know! She just-oh wait, it was 'cause I started dating Lavender . . ."

"But Lavender is hot, mate!"

He shrugged, "But all she ever wants to do is snog me. I can't ever just talk to her."

"Come on!" Seamus said bracingly, "That's even better! Besides, what would you talk to her about? Makeup?"

Ron suddenly got another glazed-eye distant look on his face, "Hermione would talk to me about everything . . . Sometimes she would even let me tell her about Quidditch, and she doesn't even like it . . ."

"You know-you know what you need to do?" Seamus said, attempting to sound fierce, but really just sounding drunk, "You need to go break up with Lavender, and then tell Hermione you love her!"

Ron looked off at nothing even longer, then finally said, "You know . . . I do. I think I really do love her . . ."

Seamus nodded, encouragingly, "Then you gotta tell her, mate!"

Ron also nodded now, "You're right!" then he stood up, so quickly, it seemed as if he was going to topple right over. Though that could've has more to do with firewhiskey.

Seamus suddenly got a serious look on his face, and looked down, "And-listen-Ron? Do . . . do you mind if I try to hook up with Lavender? After you break up with her, I mean?"

Ron shrugged, "No problem, mate." and then he turned and left the boys dormitory.

When he got down to the common room, Lavender was sitting on one of the couches. She looked up and said, "Feeling better, Won-Won?"

"Lavender-" he started, slurring her name.

"Are you alright?" she asked, noticing not only the slur, but the way he staggered up to her.

"No. Listen-I-we need to-I want to-I'm breaking up with you." He said with a hiccup.

"What?" she looked more confused than angry, "Ronald, are you drunk?"

Ron shook his head, "Don't-don't-don't call me Ronald! Only my parents and Hermione can call me Ronald!"

"What are you saying? I can_not _believe you've gone and got yourself drunk!" now she was looking more angry, "You wouldn't be saying any of this if you were sober!"

"No, Lavender, I'm breaking up with you, sober or not. And that's that!" then he walked-though it was still more of a stagger-away from her, with her glaring at the back of his head, mouth agape. Though, he couldn't remember what the other thing he was supposed to do was.

Then he saw her. Hermione came through the portrait hole, and he suddenly remembered. Her hair was as sleek and shiny as it was at the Yule Ball, and she was wearing a cream colored dress. She had just gotten back from Slughorn's party.

He walked right up to her, as confidently as he could, but still stumbled all along the way, and said, "Hermione-"

"Leave me alone." she snapped, before he could say more than her name, and started walking off toward the girls' dormitory.

He grabbed her arm, but a little more aggressively than he had meant, and said, "No! Wait!" a little too loud.

She looked up at him, her face horrified, and even a bit concerned, and asked, "Are you drunk! ?"

Ron suddenly felt panicked. If she could tell he was drunk, then he must have been making an arse of himself. He needed to tell her before he really ruined something.

"I-"

But then he interrupted himself by vomiting all over the front of Hermione's dress, as soon as he opened his mouth.

She leapt back, but it still got all over her. She looked down, and cried, "Ugh!" Then she looked back up at Ron, her face full of disgust, and said, "What is wrong with you! ?" before running up to the girls' dormitory.

Ron just stood there, stupidly, still processing what had just happened.

He became vaguely aware of the sound of laughter, as someone grabbed his arm, and pulled him out through the portrait hole.

"What _is _wrong with you?"

It was Ginny. He felt his ears burn when she repeated what Hermione had said. The laughter had come from everyone that was in the common room to witness his humiliation.

He wiped the left over vomit off his mouth, and just stared at her. It was startling how much she reminded him of their mother at the moment.

She gave him a look that made his insides shrivel, despite how much shorter she was than him.

"Seriously, Ron, have you been drinking?"

"Uh . . . no . . ." he answered automatically.

She gave him another bone-chilling look, and said, "Are you sure? I would think about your answer this time . . ."

Ron sighed, "Well . . . Seamus-"

She interrupted him with a heavy sigh, "Of course. Seamus."

"Don't blame him . . ." he muttered, regretting mentioning Seamus.

She sighed again, grabbed his arm, and turned away, saying "Come with me . . ."

He didn't protest, and let her pull him all the way to the nearest girls' room. He didn't even seem to realize he wasn't supposed to be in there. All he became aware of was the toilet in front of him, and the fact that he was not finished vomiting. He hadn't realize how sick he was feeling until the toilet was right in front of him.

He threw up several times, before he felt someone's hand on his back.

Ginny had sat down next to him, and was rubbing his back. She had even brushed back any strands of his hair that could have been in the way of his mouth.

It was this that made Ron realized what an amazing younger sister she was.

"I'm sorry . . . I'm so sorry, Gin . . . I-I-I . . ." he said between retches.

"Ron, it's alright."

The annoyance in her voice was very clear, but it seemed like she was at least trying to sound comforting.

Ron then couldn't keep himself from saying the next few things he did, as he threw up some more.

"She-She'll never forgive me . . . She'll hate me forever . . . and I deserve it . . . I should've never drunk any of that firewhiskey . . ."

Ginny sighed, "She'll forgive you eventually. Just give her some time."

Ron was definitely sobering up, so he at least realized that his plan to declare his love for Hermione in front of the entire common room had been a bad one.

"You know . . . what I was going . . . to say to her? . . . I was going to . . . to tell her I loved her . . . Seamus convinced me to . . . to do it," by now, Ron was just dry heaving, and eventually turned over so he was leaning against the toilet, panting, "I suppose it was lucky I threw up all over her dress . . . she probably would've been more disgusted if I had gone through with my original plan."

Ginny scooted back a bit, giving Ron some room, and sighed again, "You know what? You're right. It was a good thing you threw up all over Hermione before you could declare your love for her . . . but only because it would've been terrible if you drunkenly told her, especially while she's mad at you, let alone the fact that you currently have a girlfriend-"

"Not anymore."

She looked up at him, "What?"

He looked guilty and embarrassed, "Well . . . I sort of drunkenly broke up with Lavender . . ."

Despite how uncomfortable Ron looked, Ginny couldn't help but snort, "Well at least some good came out of this."

"You're joking, right?" Ron asked, somewhat annoyed at Ginny's lack of sympathy, "I mean, yeah, she was beginning to get annoying, but I don't think I can stand the evil glares she and her friends'll be giving me for the next few weeks!"

She rolled her eyes, but said in the most comforting tone she could muster, "Don't worry, Ron. We're leaving tomorrow, and I'm sure she'll get over you over break. I mean, it is _you_ we are talking about, so she'll probably be over you tomorrow morning."

Ron didn't say anything, and just closed his.

Ginny nudged his foot with hers, "What made you go get drunk, anyway?"

"I don't know. I really wish I hadn't though, now. Or at least that I'd stayed up in the dormitory. But I was talking to Seamus . . . and . . . why, the bloody hell, do I care so much about Hermione going to that stupid party with McLaggen! ?"

"Because you love her, Ron!" Ginny insisted.

Ron opened his eyes, and looked at his sister. Eventually he shook his head, "I don't."

"You just said you did, not five minutes ago!"

"I said that I was going to tell Hermione I loved her, not that I actually felt that way . . ."

"Well I know you do!" She said fiercely.

Ron only gave her a skeptical grimace.

Ginny rolled her eyes, "Alright, close your eyes!"

Sighing, Ron humored her.

"Now picture this," she continued, "You're not dating Lavender, and _you_ go to that party with Hermione. You're having fun, drinking some butterbeer, making her laugh a lot-and I see your face whenever you make her laugh, and you love it-"

"Are you going somewhere with this?" Ron interrupted.

"Yes, I am. Now, don't interrupt! Then you work up enough courage to ask Hermione to dance, and it's a slow song, and she's dancing really close to you. Then you both realize you're underneath mistletoe . . . and you snog each other's faces off!" She ended rather unceremoniously, "Now, _tell me_ you don't at least fancy her!"

Ron sighed again, refusing to open his eyes.

"See! ? You do-"

"So what? I can get over it."

"Why would you do that to Hermione! ?" Ginny nearly yelled in frustration.

Ron's eyes snapped open and he stared at her.

"She _obviously_ feels the same way about you!"

He felt his face heat up a bit at her words, but otherwise said, "Yes, who could resist a guy who ditches them for another girl, then throws up all over their dress?"

"She'll forgive you for that . . . eventually. But she will, I know she will. I know she feels the same way about you, too. Anyone close enough to you two can tell. Ask Harry if you don't believe me."

"Fine. I'll ask Harry. What if he doesn't agree with you?"

"Then I'll eat a blast-ended skrewt." She said with complete seriousness.

Ron sighed, but didn't say anything.

"You can tell too, can't you? That she fancies you?"

"She doesn't." he said shortly.

Ginny shook her head and stood up, "Life would be so much easier if you two weren't so stubborn," she said irritably, walking to the door.

"Ginny . . . thanks . . . for-you know-not letting me throw up all over the corridor." Ron said.

Ginny nodded, smiled, and said, before she left, "Right . . . well . . . you're in a girl's bathroom, so I wouldn't hang out in here much longer if I were you."

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><p>hope you liked, please review!<p> 


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